Charlie Hatches Plan to Ruin Ashton's 'Men' Debut

Charlie Sheen has lost every lawsuit against his ex-bosses at 'Two and a Half Men,' but now he has another play to harm the show that kicked him to the curb.

"Charlie's upcoming roast on Comedy Central is set to go head to head against Ashton's debut episode of 'Two and a Half Men' on September 19," a Comedy Central source tells me. "If you think this is a coincidence then you are nuts."

There will be plenty of material to go on at the roast, considering Charlie's bizarre behavior that led to him being fired, and insiders tell me nothing is off-limits.

"This is Charlie getting the last laugh. He doesn't care what they say about him at the roast as long as the show kills CBS in the ratings," a friend of the actor's tells me. "Charlie has a thick skin and can laugh at himself but if you hurt him, like he thinks Chuck Lorre did, then he doesn't forget."

While nothing will be off limits in the Sheen-ripping department, one of his exes -- Brooke Mueller -- has warned of a lawsuit if she's the butt of any jokes. "He better not go there," Brooke's rep told TMZ.

The eyebrow-raising timing of the special was first reported by the Hollywood Reporter. A Comedy Central rep claimed it was merely due to the fact the channel didn't have anything else planned.

"It's definitely fortuitous timing for us," a rep for the cable channel told THR. "Everything aligned. We were dark with 'Daily Show' and Colbert, and yes, you have the premiere of 'Two and a Half Men.'"

Lady Gaga Is 'Sick and Obsessed with her Weight'

Forget the 'Edge of Glory,' according to a report from Star magazine (via Radar Online), Lady Gaga is on a dangerous edge when it comes to her health. From her eating habits to her extreme self-scrutinizing, apparently it is just a matter of time before Gaga's unhealthy lifestyle catches up with her.

"Those who have worked with her on tour reported to me that Gaga barely ate for weeks at a time to fit into her costume," investigative journalist, Ian Halperin told Star. "She is sick and obsessed with her weight. One friend told me, Gaga will stare at herself in the mirror for hours on end, analyzing and critiquing her body. It's an unhealthy obsession."

But fitting into her outrageous and often barely there get-ups isn't the only reason Gaga is so concerned with her body -- according to Halperin, she uses her outlandish wigs and perfectly toned body to distract from the side affects of her Lupus -- a disease she has publicly admitted to battling. The disease has reportedly caused the mother monster to lose hair and break out in red blotches all over her body.

But Halperin who has been investigating Gaga for the past 12 months explains that her disease and her weight problems are not her only demons.

"Her drug use started young," he explained. "From heroin to cocaine and ecstasy, her friends say that she has done every drug conceivable. You name it she has done it. She's morphed into this caricature called Lady Gaga, who isn't even a real person. The girl known as Stefi to her friends and family has all but disappeared."

Although we imagine that it's only human to be somewhat self-scrutinizing when you're performing in front of millions, we hope that Gaga can take her own 'Born This Way' advice.

Bow Wow: I’m A Daddy!

He’s practically grown up in the public eye, and now rapper Bow Wow has shared that he’s a father to a little girl.

He took to his website to share the news, writing, "For the past three years [I've] been battling life. I felt as if I had no purpose to live (Thinking selfishly) until God gave me the illest gift of my life. No [Lamborghini], no [American Express Black Card] nothing amounts to my lil girl."

Bow Wow continued, "I was nervous on how yall would look at me. My lil girl is getting BIG fast. I love every minute of it. She inspires me to go harder. Even made me treat my mother better, it's like it made me into a man overnight."

Declining to name the baby’s mother, Bow Wow noted, "Baby gotta stay with they momma and all dat bull. I hate that! So i have to fly 5 hrs away to see her. This is my first. Shai Shai daddy love u too!"

HP hires Russell Brand for TouchPad

Hewlett-Packard has hired British actor, Russell Brand for promoting its TouchPad computer tablet.

The actor features in a serious of videos offering a funny look at some of the major features of the tablet. H takes users though brief details of some of the major functionality of the tablet combining marketing talk and humor.

Analysts say that the tablet is priced inline with rival Apple iPad but is behind in quality and features. TouchPad lacks a rear-facing camera and is only available on WiFi version now. The company is planning to launch a cellular version later.

Jon Rubinstein, senior vice president of Hewlett-Packard’s Palm Global Business Unit surprising said that the company knows about the issues and will work to address them soon.

“The good news is that most of the issues they cite are already known to us and will be addressed in short order by over-the-air software and app catalog updates,” Rubinstein wrote in a memo to the company staff.

Experts say that HP has the advantage of a large base of loyal customers but it will have to develop an ecosystem for developers to have a large app base.

Robert Pattinson's "Cosmopolis" Night Shoot

Getting in some high-paced action, Robert Pattinson was spotted filming a shooting scene for “Cosmopolis” last night (July 6).

The “New Moon” stud wielded a gun as he did a few outdoor takes on the Toronto, Canada downtown set before spending time with his fans once wrapped up.

In tabloid news, Robert is the subject of yet another relationship rumor, and this time he’s said to have ditched Kristen Stewart for Caitlin Cronenberg, the daughter of “Cosmopolis” director David Cronenberg.

However, the claims have no merit and Gossip Cop is reporting that things are merely “friendly” between Rob and Caitlin.

Caught in the Act!

What a sweet dad! Usher and his sons Usher V and Naviyd took a sunny vacation at Acqualina Resort & Spa in Miami Beach. The singer was spotted working out at the hotel's gym and also clocked time with his boys in an oceanfront pool. "They were so cute – all playing in the pool," an onlooker tells us. "It was adorable."

 Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber, nabbing his-and-her pairs of Warby Parker sunglasses at the Shark Attack Sounds Party at Rick's Crabby Cowboy Café in Montauk, N.Y., co-hosted by Watts's photographer brother, Ben. Also partying at the beach blowout: Victoria's Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio and her boyfriend Jamie Mazur.

 In town for Paris Fashion Week, fashionista (and Super 8 star) Elle Fanning snuck in a hug with designer Karl Lagerfeld after the Chanel show, which didn't even begin until after 10 p.m. Also catching the runway show: Joshua Jackson, who gallantly held an umbrella over girlfriend Diane Kruger's head as she ventured inside.

 Newlyweds Dave Annable and Odette Yustman were spotted with a group of friends at the Diesel store on Melrose Avenue in L.A., talking about their camping excursion at Big Bear over the recent holiday weekend. Says an onlooker: "It's easy to tell they are both really in love!"

Sinead O'Connor -- Nothing Compares 2 Her New Look

Doing her best Susan Boyle impersonation, former shaved head singer Sinead O'Connor showed off a softer, more matronly side at a concert in England this weekend.

This could be a huge comeback for the 44-year-old.

Justin Timberlake, Jessica Biel Giving Relationship Another Try

Breakup to makeup!
Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel might have broken up in March, but a source tells the new (on stands Wednesday) their 4-year-romance hasn't fizzled out just yet.
Timberlake, 30, and Biel, 29, are "quietly seeing each other again," says a source. "They have been talking the whole time and decided to give it another shot. Jessica really wanted to get back together with him and Justin realized single life is not what it's cracked up to be."
On July 3, the couple shared pork tacos at the Black Hoof restaurant in Toronto. But another insider cautions reconciliation won't be easy and adds that for now, "they're just spending time together and taking things slowly."